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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-11-20

  • HEATWAVE! This is my island in the sun! #muppetchristmascarol #
  • Hey, hey, hey, hey! Light the lamp, not the rat! Light the lamp, not the rat! #muppetchristmascarol #
  • What the CHrist? Was that Larry Hagman at the Cowboys game?!??! #
  • Vince Young is in. Vick took a helmet to the back. #
  • What happened in Chicago? Big ass bar room brawl on the field! #
  • Guess Detroit won't be mounting a late, late game comeback? #lions #
  • Okay, Nick Folk, you're my last player. Just need you to kick enough FGs to get me 24 fantasy points. Why are you looking at me like that? #
  • J-E-T-S FUCK FUCK FUCK! MY PICK'EM! MY FANTASY TEAM!!! *shakes fist* #
  • If you have Rob Gronkowski on your FF team, don't ever bench him. Ever. No matter what the advice says. *cry* #
  • Mark Sanchez, you are dead to me. Until next week. #Jets #
  • I'm at Jack in the Box (9825 Burnet Rd, at Rutland Dr., Austin) http://t.co/eBkihOQ5 #
  • NFL fines player for "excessive celebration" after saluting troops after catching touchdown pass. #nfl #nofunleague #stupidshit #
  • Look how "excessive" that knee on the ground and hand on the helmet is. http://t.co/c9OJzCfj #nfl #nofunleague #stupidshit #
  • Hate this parking lot so much (@ H-E-B) http://t.co/0iNA9sEn #
  • I just unlocked the "Hot Tamale" badge on @foursquare! ¡Ay, caramba! http://t.co/U7sbS0R3 #
  • I'm at TacoDeli (12001 Burnet Rd, N Mo-Pac Expy, Austin) http://t.co/rztt2PNr #
  • Ranty rant posted: Burt's Bees Sensitive Skin: A Review http://t.co/4TTcIPKM #
  • Stevie Wonder DLC for Rock Band! I guess I'm gonna have to break out my game again! #
  • I'm at The Peached Tortilla (209 Esperanza, Austin) http://t.co/een6W1ck #
  • Ahahahaha! Loved listening to @Carissajaded make @thedanielgallo spaz the hell out. Priceless. #klbjfm #
  • DAMMIT! I did NOT want to see The Hunger Games movie…but Donald Sutherland is in it. Crap in a hat. #
  • I'd watch a movie of the telephone book if Donald Sutherland was in it. #
  • I'm at Taj Mahal Indian Cuisine (12407 North Mopac Expressway, Austin) http://t.co/4HGFUaKL #
  • If you are dropping off a package for my officemate, put it on HIS desk not mine. I'm not his goddamn secretary. #
  • OMG this kitchen is really gonna happen! Before Christmas! Squeee! #whyIhavenomoney #
  • Timeline for the future according to SciFi films and tv : http://t.co/G8nKJA7u #
  • My stomach hurts. Gonna be a gassy day. I'd feel bad for my officemate, but that fucker reeks of ciggy smoke a few times a day. #
  • Whut? RT @nfl: After back-to-back wins, the Dolphins are talking playoffs ("PLAYOFFS!"): http://t.co/j0qrpsyL #
  • What the hell is going on in AISD schools? http://t.co/Do0CZz32 #
  • So in an AISD school, you can shoot your classmate with a BB gun and toss death threats and stay in class? Bu… (cont) http://t.co/h2rftmfl #
  • Happy hour! (@ Gloria's Mexican Restaurant) http://t.co/xfstvDrR #
  • I'm at Jack in the Box (9825 Burnet Rd, at Rutland Dr., Austin) http://t.co/rRogJC4a #
  • Why does everything have to go tits up on a friday? #
  • Doesn't RSVP mean to reply to say "yes Im going" or "No I'm not"? Not just "Yes, I'll be there"? #
  • Huh. An appeals court ruled that the FCC overstepped their authority when they fined CBS for the infamous Janet Jackson nipple-slip. #
  • I'm at Fry's Electronics (12707 N. Mopac Expy., Parmer Ln., Austin) w/ 3 others http://t.co/tcraS2hM #
  • I'm at County Line On the Lake (5204 Ranch Rd 2222, Austin) http://t.co/w7GaKpzu #
  • Can't resist touching (ow my finger!) then tasting (OW MY TONGUE!) the searing hot lava that is my candy (Scot… (cont) http://t.co/e24sTUCA #

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Open Letters: NFL Week 11 Thursday Night Game Edition

Dear NFL Network,

I very much dislike non Thanksgiving Thursday games. Your announcers are just horrible and frankly I’m not ready for more football by Thursday.

 

Dear Mark Sanchez and the New York Jets,

I was at a happy hour last night. I made it home in time to watch most of the game. I believe there was 3:45 left in the first quarter when I finally settled down in front of the tv. I was sleepy, because Gloria’s makes some damn strong margaritas. I curled up on the couch and heard “Nick Folk who missed a field goal earlier in the game…” I said “goddammit Nick!” and fell asleep. When I awoke, you were losing. To the goddamn Broncos. With 34 seconds left. I said “Fucking Jets.” and I watched as you, Mark, threw two passes for fuck all. I swore yet again “Jesus Christ, fuck both Tebow and Sanchez.” and went to bed. Had I stayed awake and watched the whole game, there would have been much more swearing but the same outcome. It’s good to know I can watch about 40 seconds of your game and still not have really missed anything.

 

Dear Tim “The Toolman” Tebow,

How are you the worst QB to be 4-1? I don’t understand at all. You’re not very good. Really. But you’re 4-1. I will not fall to my knees and worship at your football playing altar. You are quite possibly the worst thing to happen to sportscasters since Brett Favre. And I don’t quite know how to feel about that sudden prayer circle that happened after the game. That was…special. I’m not giving you shit about it, just saying it was….special.

Burt’s Bees Sensitive Skin: A Review

So. I am a Bzz Agent. I signed up with BzzAgent many years ago to give my opinion on new products, website, services, etc. I received a package with samples for the new skin care products by Burt’s Bees. It’s called Burt’s Bees® Natural Skin Solutions for Sensitive Skin with Cotton Extract. Lots of words, right? Well, I’ve been a Burt’s Bees user for a while now so when I had a chance to try this out I was excited. This product works great. This past Texas summer (and fall so far) has been horrible for my face. It alternated from being too oily to incredibly dry and flaky to random breakouts. I used the cleanser and moisturizer for two weeks. My skin has never felt better or more refreshed. The cleanser didn’t leave my skin feeling dry and tight and the moisturizer did not leave my skin feeling overly greasy. They both have a pleasant fragrance that is not overpowering, very much a clean smell which I love. In fact, I liked it so much overall that I had my boyfriend try it. His skin is waaaaay sensitive and this didn’t cause any reaction from his skin.

Summary:

Burt’s Bees Naturals Sensitive Skin Care is great for both women and men. At least in my house. Go to the website and get your $2 off coupon and try it for yourself.

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-11-13

  • Who callas a timeout 1 minute and 18 seconds into the game????? #
  • JESUS CHRIST COWBOYS! TWO PENALTIES ? THE GAME JUST FUCKING STARTED! #
  • Kickoff, penalty (cowboys), timeout (seahawks), penalty (cowboys), no yard play, punt. This is going to suck, isn't it? #cowboys #
  • So do the Seahawks. Really? A timeout? RT @dallasprosports: Cowboys already look sad and pathetic. #
  • Ready to watch Dallas fail to score in the Red Zone. Again #
  • *sigh* and I am not disappointed. Gotta go for another FG. Go Bailey. #
  • Here's a tip: If you are at Whatever & Goal, THE OTHER TEAM IS GOING TO BLITZ. PERIOD. #
  • Dammit, Chiefs! You are not supposed to lose to the dolphins! Thanks for wrecking my pick'em! *grump* #
  • Quickest way to get me to never visit your site ever again: have music playing with no easy way to shut it off. STOP THAT SHIT. #
  • Looks like I'm back to swearing at the Bengals again. My pick'em…my pick'em…. But hey! My fantasy league! Woot! I'm so conflicted…. #
  • It's gonna be THAT kind of game. #SNFonNBC #steelers #
  • Swing and a miss! #SNFonNBC #steelers #
  • I'm sorry, did Terrell Suggs just call himself "Sizzle?" You don't get to give yourself a nickname! #SNFonNFL #
  • Goddammit! Did we just lose Ward? ALREADY?? Fuck nuggets! #SNFonNBC #steelers #
  • I LOVE Mayhem commercials…. #allstate #
  • "That's a penalty, that's a fine, but in this game, I don't think they care." Ah, Collinsworth…. #SNFonNBC #steelers #ravens #
  • Cincinnati is 6-2? What? WHAT? #
  • GODDAMMIT!!!! WHAT IN THE FUCKING FUCK????? BLARGHHGRHRGHAGGSD!!! RAGE!!!! #SNFonNBC #steelers #
  • Oh my lord, I am SOOOOOOO GLAD Harrison is back. #SNFonNBC #steelers #
  • I have no willpower (@ Jack in the Box) http://t.co/mhpT0h1M #
  • Oh surprise, surprise, my facilities ticket was marked complete and it's still hot in my goddamn office. Assholes. #
  • I HAVE AC IN MY OFFICE. YAY!!!! Er, is it a bit chilly in here….. #
  • LEGO Army assemble! http://t.co/rbR6hFZO #
  • CRAP!!!! RT @WootLive: WARNING: only 46 days 'til Christmas. #WeHaveWishLists #
  • I'm at P.F. Chang's (10114 Jollyville Rd., Great Hills Tr., Austin) http://t.co/dIT6tPJ8 #
  • Dammit, Excel, what the hell happened to Right Click->Fill->Series?!?!? *grump* Got me huntin' all over that damn ribbon….. #
  • Fine, engine. FINE! You wanna be a little bitch and not do what I say? Well, I'm rebooting your machine! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! #
  • Well, this is depressing. I like football, but goddamn, we can;t do better than 1950's safety? http://t.co/yvbiqSiP #
  • I swear to God, engine, if you don;t start properly……. #
  • Yeah, you BETTER had start and connect you supposed to. Tha's right! #
  • Wait, WHAT??? RT @AustinMovieSnob: What?! RT @emilyooo RIP Heavy D 🙁 #fb #
  • Dammit! http://t.co/4plUhpOZ #hiphoplegend #
  • I'm at TacoDeli (12001 Burnet Rd, N Mo-Pac Expy, Austin) http://t.co/a3Biqk45 #
  • Guess who walked 3.4 miles to work this morning? Guess who doesn't feel the need to do it again. Crap…how am I gonna get home? #
  • RT @JamesUrbaniak: Bil Keane is dead. Hipsters nationwide observe one minute of silent détournement. #
  • GODDAMMIT WE KNOW! WE KNOW THERE'S A FUCKING EMERGENCY ALERT TEST TODAY! STOP TALKING ABOUT IT! #
  • Ah hell, now I'M part of the problem. #
  • Oh hey. Bag of Crap. #
  • I have clicked the stupidly large gold button. #
  • Holy crap. I think I got a crap! #wootoff #
  • "Tests Show Most Store Honey Isn't Honey" So…what is it? Thick sugar water? Bee vomit? Zebra spooge? http://t.co/9RjSfKaQ #
  • I'm at Sonic Drive-In (10025 N Burnet Rd, at Rutland Dr, Austin) http://t.co/PuleWr2e #
  • Why am I *still* getting emails from the school? No, I'm not coming to your ring ceremony. I'm not even going to graduation. #
  • Who the hell sets a password to expire at 4:15pm on a workday? #
  • "Refs need to be fined for bad calls. " Yes. Yes they do. #nfl #
  • I'm at Mimi's Cafe (10515 N Mopac Expy, HWY 183, Austin) http://t.co/oZNwO7hh #
  • I'm at Origami (110 N IH-35, Suite 200B, Round Rock) http://t.co/Ofj4Wq1d #
  • I'm at Original Pancake House (1700 W Parmer Ln, Metric Blvd, Austin) w/ 3 others http://t.co/JAS6CLjw #
  • is finally playing Cities in Motion and completely ignoring all homework. http://t.co/slKYRTyB #

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Kitchen Remodel: The Timing

I must have a hearing problem. Or maybe it’s just a comprehension problem. Because people will tell me things and I will swear up and down that I understand but when the time comes to repeat or do something with that information I have it all fucking wrong. Just wrong wrong wrong.

Under Budget Kitchens is doing my kitchen. It was explained to me (a couple of times by now) what the timeline was. This what I heard:

December 5: week the cabinets come in
December 7: the day they actually come in
December 15-16: The days the cabinets get busted out and reinstalled
The time between the cabinets coming in and the them getting installed: other construction work to fix my 70’s style house.

My floor is a mess right now. We pulled up the flooring and now there’s horrible nasty 35 year old adhesive stuck to the concrete. I want this fixed now because it’s just ugly and nasty and the old cabinets are there so they can be bumped into with wild abandon. The original plan was to do floors later because I had no money. Well, that went to hell when I tried to pull it up myself (with help from Aelerelean…okay, he did it and I barely helped. I managed. yeah that’s it) and it came up fine. So I looked for a stained/polished concrete guy, thinking “I can get this done now!” Then I remembered. One of the cabinets is going to be shorter than it is now. Meaning, if I got the floors done, there would be this 3 inch space of non treated concrete. SHIT. How do I do this? How do I …oh wait. When is my demo date? Yeah. I’m an idiot. Here’s the actual timeline:

December 5: Demo the kitchen
December 6-14: Demo and reconstruct more of the kitchen
December 15-16: Install the kitchen

Like I said, I must have a hearing problem because for the life of me I could not figure out how this was going to work. You’re probably out there saying “My God, you’re a moron.” Yes. Yes I am. But I’ll be a moron with a new kitchen.

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-11-06

  • Ravens, what are you doing to me???? Why are you stuggling??? #
  • That was holding! What the fuck? Stevie Wonder could see that goddamn hold! #SNF #
  • This is the Shit Game of the Week. Get the refs some fucking glasses. #SNF #
  • And now the crowd chants "Romo sucks!" Sigh. Stay classy, Philly. #
  • Michael Vick bought a parrot? Why…why did you mention this? What? #SNF #
  • Guess she didn't know how to Disapparate. RT @GeorgeTakei: Apparently, she couldn't drive stick. http://t.co/X90lVTBe #
  • Things that Turbo Pascal is smaller than http://t.co/qwaNpp8k #
  • RT @FauxJohnMadden: Phillip Rivers current QB rating is "Tim Tebow" #
  • Closing on my loan. (@ Velocity Credit Union) http://t.co/68yGJSxn #
  • I'm at Sonic Drive-In (10025 N Burnet Rd, at Rutland Dr, Austin) http://t.co/6744gs1S #
  • My god. 360 is already horrible. RT @statesman: A meeting about Loop 360 this evening will explain some propos… (cont) http://t.co/9TJM4L1b #
  • Fuck this floor, fuck this floor. Fuck. This. Goddamn. Floor. http://t.co/6Vc3wAJ3 #
  • Why do I want to see Jack and Jill? #
  • Amazon has started early Black Friday deals. SQUEEEE! http://t.co/kJBi6OPc #
  • is finally playing Cities in Motion and completely ignoring all homework. http://t.co/slKYRTyB #
  • This guy has a great girlfriend. http://t.co/YPUBo9wx #
  • When I asked you yesterday what version to use, you said 10.1. Today, you say 10.0. Thank you very much for making me waste a day. Dicks. #
  • Omg my kitchen is really happening. (@ Underbudget Kitchens) http://t.co/VCgTTaIO #
  • is finally playing Cities in Motion and completely ignoring all homework. http://t.co/slKYRTyB #
  • Meat!!!!! (@ Estancia Churrascaria Brazilian Steakhouse) http://t.co/Ca0UpQ2X #
  • I'm at Exxon Tiger Market (10800 Research Blvd, W Braker Ln, Austin) http://t.co/jlYfdcwK #
  • Dear Ice Cream Man, why did your truck play Deck the Halls, Silent Night and Jingle Bells? You bad man. #
  • I'm at The Park at the Domain (11601 Domain Drive, Suite 200, Austin) http://t.co/rs5rTmVr #
  • Blargh! Out of bounds at the 7. Can these refs replace the NFL refs? #LSU #

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Kitchen Remodel: The Beginning

When I moved into my house 8 years ago (holy crap) I decided that the kitchen had to go. The appliances were old, the floor was old, the countertops were YELLOW, the blinds were also yellow with darker yellow flowers on them.

It had to go.

But hell, I didn’t have kind of money. So I waited. I upgraded the fridge and the stove, did what I could with the pantry, but eventually I knew I couldn’t go any longer without a full renovation. I made my decision to dig myself out of some debt (some. If I wait for ‘all’ it would never get done) then get going on the kitchen. Now all I knew is that I wanted New Kitchen. What color paint? Dunno. What kind of countertops? Not yellow. What kind of cabinets? Not ones that drop slivers of wood into everything. What did I want? Not This.

So the plan was to pay off a big chunk of debt then in January, get a new kitchen. I decide to execute on this plan in August. Since I didn’t know what I wanted, I figured I should go get some ideas of what I could so. I went to Under Budget Kitchens since I knew other people had had good experiences with them. I look at some cabinets, talked to the owner and before I knew it, I was scheduling an appointment for a measuring. Oh God too soon!

Not too soon. After the measuring came the CAD renderings. I was in love. I wanted my new kitchen RIGHT NOW. I made some decisions on style and color then type of counter tops. The more I thought about it, the more excited and anxious I became. Fuck January, let’s get it started now!

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-10-30

  • Yup. That last layer of tile (or first, going by order of installation) has asbestos. Wheee. #
  • "The Saints had more points last night (62) than the Rams have all season (56)" #
  • New office. One ethernet port. The port doesn't "accept" switches. I have 5 machines on my desk. #
  • The person/dept responsible says "he didn't know we all have more than one machine." We've known about this move for over a year. WTF. #
  • I'm at Double Dave's Pizza Works (11900 Metric Blvd, at Stone Hollow, Austin) http://t.co/LXkAVyfK #
  • Oh goody! My VOIP phone thingy has a password that expires in 90 days! Could I possibly have more unsynced passwords? Please? #
  • Why do I have to log in to my phone??? #
  • Worst. Office move. Ever. #
  • There is no ac in my office. There are 8 computers in here and two large people. This. This is bullshit. #
  • What the hell kind of turf is in Jacksonville? Really short grass? Moss? Painted sand?? #MNF #
  • WHat in the FUCK is going on in Jacksonville???? Why is your punter making blocks??? WHY????#MNF #
  • 14 plays and 7 yards of offense for the Ravens after that sack. I…I need a drink. #
  • That's not football. That's to small to be real football. #
  • FUCKING HELL!!! JAGUARS BALL! WHAT IN THE CHRIST. #
  • Rice has not fumbled a ball since 2009. Until tonight. Twice. Jesus. #
  • "If that stadium gets any emptier a Marlins game is going to break out." ahahahaha. Presenting your Los Angeles Jaguars…. #
  • Sorry, you guys, but this game is Uwe Boll bad. Even if you don't watch football, you should watch this game. It's horror. It's Halloween. #
  • 4th and 43. Jesus! At least he didn't fumble it. I guess. They may not even be able to punt it past the 1st down marker. #
  • 75 yards of offense. Total. #MNF #
  • Can't make a decent play? Just go ahead and fight. I guess. #
  • Are you happy, Jags and Ravens? you just sent @aelerelean into a choking fit. #
  • Ravens file complaint with the NFL about draft day confusion. How about a complaint for whatever the hell it is you're doing right now? #MNF #
  • "If you like offense, close your eyes…" I love you Tirico #MNF #
  • Hey! You're supposed to be able to punch with an open hand! BULLSHIT CALL! #MNF #
  • There's no phone in the conference room. This scrum is being handled by a coworker's cell phone. #
  • Why the hell do I need to install special software to connect to the fucking wireless LAN??? #
  • Day 2 of no AC. Network is slow and flaky. There is no excuse for this. At all. #
  • Head hurts, too hot, wireless took 2 goddamn hours to set up (and it's shitty). *grump* #crabbyday #
  • Asshole of the day: It's a tie between the guy who stole $1000 from a benefit for the Bastrop fire victims..(cont) #
  • And the guy who broke into Big Brother Big Sisters (busted a window) and stole laptops, other electronics, AND A BOWL OF HALLOWEEN CANDY. #
  • Big Brothers Big Sisters of Austin as been broken into 3 times in 3 weeks. There are some serious assholes in this town. #
  • Watching coworkers get a flu shot. (@ IBM (building 101)) http://t.co/FiCqzlYM #
  • Day 3 of no AC. Contact has been made with facilities. I can now connect a switch to my ethernet port. #
  • I'm at Toys R Us (12901 N I H 35 # 800, Mouse Lane, Austin) http://t.co/EGVcwVMI #
  • What is this? Why is this? Why is Ice-T white? What? http://t.co/mh602RVv #
  • I'm at TacoDeli (12001 Burnet Rd, N Mo-Pac Expy, Austin) http://t.co/GQQGWnrQ #
  • I'm at Velocity Credit Union (610 E 11th St., at Sabine St., Austin) http://t.co/l0AmC4aD #
  • Office mate is gone for the day! Now I can fart with wild abandon! #
  • I'm at H-E-B (12407 N Mopac Expy, at W Parmer Ln, Austin) http://t.co/lmfv9Jcc #
  • Dear Austinites, It's only 52 out. No need for hats, scarves, parkas and furry boots. Settle down. #
  • South Point Nissan: "Because it's all over when the zombies come." Nice, one, guys. #
  • Don't come into my office and say "Wow! It's still hot in here!" Yes, motherfucker, WE KNOW! #
  • I want to not cough anymore. Is that possible? Please? because this fucking sucks. #
  • Cool! I got my home improvement loan! #
  • What is this shit? Egg nog is for Christmas, bitches! http://t.co/dpjigYec #
  • I'm at Home Depot (10515 N Mopac Expwy, Braker Ln, Austin) http://t.co/sAyosVJe #
  • Christ I hate this parking lot. All Chuy's fault. (@ Brick House Tavern + Tap) http://t.co/0ICG75rx #

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Open Letter: NFL Week 7

Dear Chicago Bears and Baltimore Ravens,

What in the everloving hell was that? That was quite possibly the worst games I have ever seen. Ever. Ever. You guys should be ashamed of yourselves. Could we possibly have more penalties? How is it that Joe Flacco’s best completion was TO HIMSELF? How is it that the Ravens didn’t get a first down until the 3rd quarter?? Jesus Christ Almighty.

 

Dear Refs for the aforementioned travesty,

You are horrible at your jobs. Horrible. You should be fired.

 

Dear Saints,

62 points. Hoooooly crap. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Congrats on scoring more points in one game than the Rams have scored all season.

 

Dear Colts,

Peyton IS the team. You proved it. My heart, she aches for you.

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-10-23

  • I'm at Central Market (4001 N. Lamar Blvd., 38th St., Austin) http://t.co/P0P9oSro #
  • I'm at Archiver's (11066 Pecan Park Boulevard, Suite 105, Lakeline Mall Dr., Cedar Park) http://t.co/huDk6UAq #
  • What the hell, Jo Beth Williams? You don't flush a dead bird! #amcfearfest #poltergeist #
  • Man, I forgot how annoying Carol-Anne's voice was. #amcfearfest #poltergeist #
  • If you see a steak inching it's way across a countertop, don't shine a flashlight on it. Just…don't. #amcfearfest #poltergeist #
  • "This house is clean." No ma'am. No it is not. There's still 30 minutes of movie left! #amcfearfest #poltergeist #
  • What the? Why the hell wasn't that clown doll the first thing thrown out of that damn house? Creepy ass clown… #amcfearfest #poltergeist #
  • I don't know why, but I really like the "stretch the hallway" effect. #poltergeist #
  • "YOU ONLY MOVED THE HEADSTONES!" Cheap bastards. #poltergeist #amcfearfest #
  • I'm at Casa Chapala (3010 W Anderson Ln, Shoal Creek Blvd., Austin) http://t.co/YVE0VSYE #
  • Checking out our new digs. (@ IBM (Building 906)) http://t.co/7Mw3bZIe #
  • I'm at Exxon Tigermarket (12000 North Mopac Expressway, Austin) http://t.co/zvnqv8uO #
  • Critter caught in the cube next to me. ewww. http://t.co/xPx9QDqj #
  • Burger tour! (@ Hat Creek Burger Catering) http://t.co/owNBWpgs #
  • Yes indeed he is. RT @nerdyface: @stephenfry really is the best audiobook reader. #
  • Quote-along! (@ Alamo Drafthouse Cinema – Lake Creek for Shaun of the Dead w/ 5 others) http://t.co/tUdp33nu #
  • The one thing I agree with Herman Cain on: Black, not African-American. #
  • Things you didn't really want to know: American Dad porn exists. And there is a Roger. I am intrigued. #
  • RT @scottkeir: Hi @marksandspencer -there's a mistake on your website- all astronomy toys just in boys section… (cont) http://t.co/GB38nRKQ #
  • I'm at Home Depot (10515 N Mopac Expwy, Braker Ln, Austin) http://t.co/ATc6kWHo #
  • Last day at the building by the lake. I shall miss the greenbelt and the water. I shall NOT miss 360. Screw you, 360. #
  • Oh hey, House of Wax is on! With Paris Hilton. Dammit. 🙁 #amcfearfest #houseofwax #
  • Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane. What? This is a real movie? #amcfearfest #
  • When you fire a gun in the hold of a plane (what), bullets do this thing called ricocheting. That's why your dumbass got shot. #ancfearfest #
  • I'm at Carino's Italian Grill (12901 N I H 35, at Parmer Ln, Austin) http://t.co/F8xqdKhC #
  • Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak On A Plane was HORRIBLE. @amc_tv should be ashamed of themselves for airing it. That's a @syfy movie. #
  • Never, ever, EVER assume that there is only one layer of kitchen flooring. I don't care if you watched them build your house… #
  • There will always be at least 2 more layers of some nasty looking flooring. And one layer of "hmmm, is this asbestos?" #
  • SUCCESS! Thanks to an old floor steamer I have now hit concrete! I still wonder if this is asbestos. I hope not. #
  • I'm at Austin Regional Clinic Quarry Lake (4515 Seton Center Blvd, Austint) http://t.co/AQQtBkRf #
  • Dammit, I was just here yesterday. (@ Home Depot) http://t.co/x8x5jm7E #
  • I'm at Logan's Roadhouse (2702 Parker Rd, W Louis Henna Blvd, Round Rock) w/ 2 others http://t.co/vcCyPUya #
  • I'm at Lester E. Palmer Events Center (900 Barton Springs Rd., Btw S 1st St. & S Lamar Blvd., Austin) http://t.co/H37iacVR #
  • I'm at Shipley Do-Nuts (10019 West Parmer Ln. #100 Austin) http://t.co/ikzybfnC #

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