Dear Pittsburgh Steelers,
THE MOTHERFUCKING BROWNS. What the fuck guys. What in the ever loving fuck? You know what? I’m fucking picking the Texans to win. In your house. Because Jesus fucking Christ I don’t know what the fuck is going on with you. Fuck. You got me rooting for the Bengals. You got me ready to SWEAR OFF FOOTBALL for hockey full time. I can only hope the Penguins don’t suck as much as you this year.
Dear Dallas Football Cowboys,
What the fuck did I see? Did I really see that? Did I really? *sniff* I’m almost proud of you. Fuck dem Shitbirds. Fuck dem Shitbirds in their own fucking house. Goddamn, guys. I mean…Goddamn. *slow clap*