• I'm at Opal Divine's Marina (Austin, TX) w/ 2 others http://t.co/MObfRACB #
  • Are you stupid? A kid with a 3.7 getting a scholarship is BAD? Shut the fuck up about P. Diddy's kid getting a scholarship. Jesus Christ. #
  • I'm sorry. It's my fault you can't play Diablo 3 right now. Why? Because I just bought the game. So of course everything's down. #
  • THIS IS AFFECTING PRODUCTION!/THIS DIRECTLY AFFECTS PATIENT CARE! #diablo3 #
  • Perfect use of Hazmat Guy! http://t.co/HJX50HAG #
  • http://t.co/HJX50HAG Perfect use of Hazmat Guy! #
  • Goddammit. Sorry about the double post. #
  • I'm at Thai Cuisine (Austin, TX) http://t.co/qNMAVliR #
  • What the fucking fuck. RT @_Snape_: #YouShouldBeAshamed if you do this to yourself: http://t.co/0989SIqb #
  • Mmmmm the Thai Cuisine (really) restaurant had something called Garlic Paradise. So wonderful. No vampires near me today. #
  • http://t.co/6JHMiQay "My daughter was humiliated!" Welp, do your fucking homework. She's 8. Why didn't mom make sure she did it? #
  • Quit your bitching and be a fucking parent. #
  • "JC Penney runs Father's Day ad featuring gay fathers." Guess I need to shop JC Penney more. Good on you, guys! #
  • There is so much stupid in this country…. http://t.co/eZDqjtbR #
  • I'm at Panera Bread (Austin, TX) http://t.co/grgefRvj #
  • SERIOUSLY! RT @therobertluke: How are there so many movies where Kristen Stewart is the most sought after woman on the planet? #
  • What makes a shitty parent: Teaching your 3 year old to stand up in church and sing "ain't no homo gonna make it to heaven." #
  • *sigh* Only one thing standing between me and this Mini truck. $14,500 🙁 Okay, 14,500 things. http://t.co/69Yf4Te9 #
  • is finally playing Tropico 3: Absolute Power http://t.co/cidqpoo8 #
  • SHUT THE FUCKING DOOR! SHUT THE FUCKING DOOR! SHUT THE GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING DOOR YOU INCONSIDERATE PRICK! #speakerphoneasshole #
  • There's something not right with this picture. Not sure I can put my finger on it… http://t.co/poEOn0R5 #
  • I'm at Your Mom's Burger Bar (Austin, Texas) w/ 2 others http://t.co/2QHNmmi8 #
  • Fuck it. It's Friday, I just got back from greasy cheese filled burger land. Scotch time. #
  • Wow. I totally agree RT @WootLive: There's a new, gay, Green Lantern in town. Randy doesn't like it. http://t.co/n9Zwn95z #
  • Why is there Balto porn fanfic? #
  • Fuck it, I'll just play Solitaire! http://t.co/h3IsFMMT #
  • is finally playing Tropico 3: Absolute Power http://t.co/cidqpoo8 #
  • I'm at Wings 'N More (Austin, TX) w/ 2 others http://t.co/jg4kHeTn #
  • I just unlocked the “Porky” badge on @foursquare for checking in to barbecue spots! Brisket all around! http://t.co/Le4pWKU4 #
  • I'm at Rudy's Country Store & Bar-B-Q (Austin, TX) w/ 2 others http://t.co/ksDinVkM #
  • I'm at Einstein Bros Bagels (Austin, TX) http://t.co/4KPo20d2 #
  • Dammit! RT @bzzagentjono: Sad. Mr "Survey Says" Richard Dawson RIP http://t.co/MVZTQ0KK #

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