Colt McCoy starts for the Browns this Sunday. All over town, people who like that damn burnt orange color are excited as hell to see their very own favorite QB start in the NFL. Against the Steelers.

They’re gonna fucking kill him.

First of all, the Steelers have  an awesomely ranked defense. Harrison and Farrior can fuck some shit up, Woodley has been a veritable beast lately, and Polamalu’s healthy. A healthy Polamalu should be every quarterback’s recurring night terror.

Second, McCoy is a rookie. Have you seem what the NFL does to rookies? There’s always that first (second, third…) “Welcome to the NFL” hit. And they hurt.

Third, again, Colt’s a rookie. We don’t know what this is going to do to him. Will he thrive? Will he be scared shitless and just throw away the ball? Will he be carted off in the middle of the 1st half on a stretcher? We don’t know! Aelerelean has a theory that it could go one of two ways:

“”Turns out McCoy has the best win-loss record ever in college football.
Not gonna help him Sunday, but it might mean no prima-donna meltdown.
Or it could mean “lose? How could we have lost? I’m Colt McCoy!” Followed by shouting at refs, arguing with coach, then getting picked up by police at 3am Monday morning passed out in a van handcuffed to an underage hooker in a UT cheerleader uniform.”

So, yeah, awesome rookie, or Vince Young. My vote? Option 3: Stretcher.

And yeah, I’m still ragging on Vince. Because, goddammit, that was shameful. It’s gonna take me a while to get over it.

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